Heaven is a hot shower

June 23, 2013 by skulkingground 1 Comment

If I believed in heaven, and I’m not sure I don’t. A hot shower would come pretty close. I can count on one hand how many I’ve had in the last six weeks and each time I have one I feel new again. Like every molecule in my body is rejoicing, every compound enlightened.

I used to have quite a lot of stuff. Moisture, make-up, stuff to take the make-up off, on, off, on, off, etc, etc.. Now there’s no room and no need for any of it. The standard routine now is a happy apple 3 in 1 followed by an eau du repel chaser. Not that I’m advocating it, it’s not something I completely recommend. The bags under my eyes have moved down to be closer to my nostrils, my legs are a hairy habitat for a new breed of marmoset monkey and I can no longer get a comb through my hair, (a couple still need to be recovered). Jacob’s beard has taken over most of his face and seems to have a personality of its own. He leaves bits of rice and leftovers to feed it and keeps a comb (half a comb, the other bit broke when I tried using it) in the pocket of the drivers door and grooms it while he drives. It’s a bit creepy, so much hair, it keeps growing, I’m worried it wants to suffocate me in my sleep.